French pharmacies: do you like sick jokes?

Nadjenka Boudjilivitch suggested ‘pharmacy visits’ as a rich topic of humiliation. Suggest your own topic for a personalised embarrassment-related post.

Pharmacies in Paris combine the patient confidentiality aspects of a medical clinic with the shopfloor ambience of H&M.

It is not uncommon to find yourself explaining an embarrassing situation to a small audience of passive eavesdroppers: “Excuse, do you have the same model as that lady has but in ‘more absorbent’?”

For these reasons, if you have a choice of staff, it is best not to approach the older – and therefore deafer – pharmacist for advice.

A friend recently witnessed this exchange:

Young, elegant Parisian woman: [inaudible whisper]

Old pharmacist: “You’d like what, sorry?”

Young woman: A SUPPOSITORY.

This potential for embarrassment has led some enterprising young French people to make gain from the pain. A few years ago, a young business school graduate launched a successful online business to deliver adult diapers in inconspicuous packaging to your home addresses. His website even has a blog.

The last time I was in a pharmacy it was with my housemate. We needed to buy a syringe.

The pharmacists presented a 30ml model.

“Do you have any bigger?” I asked.

She presented a 50ml version.

“We’re going to need something more substantial,” I said.

Rummaging she pulled out a 100ml.

“No…do you have anything for use on large animals?” I asked, nodding at my housemate for approval.

By now the curiosity got the better of her. I could see she wasn’t going to search further without knowing what we needed it for.

I stepped in to explain: “We need to inject a watermelon.”

Looking from me to my housemate, I could see her wondering which of the two would be the lucky recipient.

“Well I don’t know if we have anything that big, but I’ll see what I can find,” she responded.

Who knows what the pharmacist thought, but for the housemate and I, we made one damned good vodka watermelon.

The worst thing I've injected...

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One Response to “French pharmacies: do you like sick jokes?”

  1. Nadjenka Boudjilivitch Says:

    Try picking up y**st infection meds for a guy friend. The pharmacists didn’t believe that I wasn’t asking for moi and neither did the people listening in line behind me.

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